Putting it out there

 
{found here}

i have hesitated. 

do i really want to tell the world? 

{Because you know, the world reads my blog! Ha!} 

If i put it on my blog, then i really can't back out. 

Ok, yes, i will say it out loud and then you guys have to hold me accountable. 

Here goes...

I am tired of being tired.  I want out from under this fat suit.  I am changing my life.  I am never looking back.  I want to be healthy and fit. 

For reals.

What did you think i was going to say?  :-)  sheesh!

So here's the skinny {pun definitely intended}.  I'm not going to hold anything back.  Maybe you can identify with what i'm going to share.  Maybe not.  But, i feel like putting this out there, is part of my healing.  Because let's get completely real here...it's not just about what you put in your stomach.  It's about what's in your head, your heart and your soul. 

 
{via pinterest}

I have been on a rollercoaster of diets and weight loss my whole entire life.  I have never been skinny.  Never.  That word has never been associated with me.  You name the diet, i have been on it.  I have joined gyms, i have bought videos, i have followed plans.  I have lost as much as 50 pounds {on weight watchers} after i had Katie.  Then i had Riley and put it all back on. 

 
{roller coaster highway, Tulsa, Oklahoma via pinterest}

I am 41 years old.  But, i feel much older.  I am too young to feel this old.  I'm done making excuses and wasting my youth in this body.  I have a blessed life.  I am surrounded by the most wonderful husband, children, family and friends anyone could ask for.  I was given this incredible talent and am blessed to be able to share it with the world (and work from home, to boot!)  I have everything a girl could ask for with one elusive exception...my weight. 

So, how is it going to be different this time?  I will tell you.  I have always tried to mend the way i eat along with getting active.  Which is great, really.  But, i have found that those are only two pieces of a larger puzzle.  And for me, that puzzle includes the way i think and my faith. 

 
{underground water tunnel coaster in Yokohama, Japan. Photo via google images}

So...I am going to take you on this journey with me.  It will not be for a set amount of time, because this journey is going to be ongoing for the rest of my life.  This is not about getting skinny, it's about taking charge of my health.  Oh, this blog is still all about my art, my family, my crafting and my crazy life.  But, this is now a huge part of life for me and I would not be honest with you if i didn't say that it terrifies me that i might fail....AGAIN.  However, something in my heart...something big...tells me that i'm not going to fail this time.  So, there, i told you.  

 
{found here}

And, if you've ever ridden that weight loss roller coaster before (or if you are riding it now), just know that i'm in that seat right next to you. 

Hang on...it's going to be a bumpy ride.

Comments

[Victoria]

AMEN!! I've been on the same rollercoaster. I've been thin, but it seems like my entire adult life has been battling weight and I'm tired of it! I want to wear cute sun dresses. I want to feel free at the beach, even in a skirted suit! I want to wear tube tops and not feel like my arms and chest are overflowing out of it. I want to wear my favorite pair of jeans with a tight tank top instead of flowing ones to hide my muffin top because I gained weight again. I want to feel sexy for my husband, and be a mom that my children can be proud of. So AMEN Lori! You go girl! I've started the same thing a couple of months ago - not a fad lose weight fast diet, but better eating habits, exercise regiment and a lifestyle change. So I commend you for putting it out there and I'll be here celebrating with you as you succeed!

[Carolyn@SweetChaos]

LORI!!! I am soooo proud of you for "putting it out there." You are so beautiful, and you deserve to feel good. If you ever want a workout partner, let me know! Our "no name shop" above the garage is full of workout equipment. I'm on Day 3 of Twizzler detox, and I'm losing my mind. But, I'm determined to change my eating habits so I can have more energy and feel better about myself. You go, girl!!

[Chrisi]

LORI!!! LET'S DO THIS TOGETHER!!! I am FOR REAL! I just went to the doctor today and was told I am diabetic. WHAT?!?! I was told I need to eat better and exercise - both of which I am known for NOT doing.....but I want to be around to watch my sweet Lucy walk down the aisle at graduations AND when she gets married - so I have to start taking care of myself. Let me know if you're game for having a seat mate on your roller coaster ride - I wanna be fisrt in line!

[Mary M]

Lori - wow - you really touched me. I get it too - truly and really - and am still trying to get on that path consistently. You have an ear here.

[Miss Paula]

Is there a way I can email you!! I have a way I am working in this and it doesn't require any detox etc!! MY MIL, and 2 friends from church are doing this and you can be a part too!

[Margaret]

You know, I am on a similiar journey. I am seeing the effects of the extra weight, and this has got to stop. I have been good for about a month and am wavering right now. I have talked to you about walking in the late afternoons, but have you noticed that I have not yet picked up the phone? It's very very hard to get started for me. Anyway, I am proud of you for making your battle public, and will gladly listen anytime and/or walk or bike with you, or share strategies or whatever.

[Jen]

Lori, I wanted to share my story with you -- I, too, have roller coastered -- Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Atkins, cabbage soup -- you name it, I've tried it. I had pretty much given up. Last summer I had what I call "divine intervention". Out of the blue, I had the thought, "I'm going to lose 100 pounds." I started praying about it, and I have never had so much will power in my life. I am half way to losing 100 pounds. Keep praying!

[Your Mark]

I like roller coasters too but I love you most my sweetest and bravest Lori. I am blessed to share in your life. We will complete the puzzle together...we will win together!

[Mik]

i am so proud of you...i always have been. i love you no matter what and am so blessed to have you for my sister. xoxo

[jenny elkins]

I am on the same journey...trying to make better choices and I am not calling it diet anymore. I havent lost much at this point but I don't want to. I hate gaining it back. I will be following you on your journey. I am proud of you!